Happy Valentine's day friends! . . . I know how you're feeling, if like me, you're single; this can be a day where you feel inclined to drown yourself in a sorrowful pool of heart-shaped candies and load up on other pink sweets - hoping that will numb out the frustration. Whether it be the lack of affection, sex, intimacy, connection, or the feeling of overall lack (which our ego-lead society supports on a day when ROMANCE RULES) there is a definite emptiness feeling that is in constant search for more of something. I have personally known what it feels like, for example, to linger in the refrigerator or pantry looking for snacks in the hopes of numbing the empty feeling. In fact, many of us become experts at knowing that feeling. We can describe every nuance. But that's a different post.
Well, guess what friends! Valentine's day can be celebrated in a better way (without all of the pink impulse-buys at the grocery store): by aligning with love. The trick is in celebrating and finding the good in every moment and focusing only on what you love. I know. I make it sound easy. And the truth is that sometimes it's not so simple. There are often times blocks to love. But if we can remove those blocks and align with love - there can be no feelings of lack at all in our awareness. So that brings me to our question of the day. What the heck is love anyway?
As we grow into childhood, we are told that love is a feeling or emotion. It's mysterious, but we know that special feeling instantly when it wraps us in that perfect warm embrace. When adulthood comes around, we start to get caught up in the byproducts that our ego creates in response to being in-love (an unhealthy attachment to a form that turns into obsession and/or fixation on the form to an extreme end when the obsession results in agony at the temporary or permenent loss of the form): boyfriends who go on long work trips, girlfriends who say they need some "space," dates that end in a perfect goodnight kiss but maybe the person doesn't call soon enough afterwards...not to mention all of the roses, chocolates, candle-lit dinners, and cards that we think shows that we love someone...but truly each item just supports the idea that love should be surrounded by a bunch of stuff (we are conditioned to have around the person we love) because we are a consumer society. Yes, we oftentimes consume many boyfriends, girlfriends, or romantic partners throughout our little lives also, like we're devouring a package of M&Ms. We focus on the forms in life, because it's easy to sense them and become attached to them. We were conditioned for about the first decade of our lives to rely on our 5 senses only and label absolutely everything like crazy, the years of the sponge-brain. The trouble with that is we are not simply machines that use 5 senses to perceive life; we are formless energy at our core. This energy is unique, the perfect energetic field that manifests all life as we know it.
When our energy is vibrating at a high frequency - we feel most alive. We are excited to feel not only our 5 senses, but also the simple act of being in the present moment. That aliveness shines very brightly and we smile, laugh, hug, dance, sing, and joke in a childlike way. Watch a baby laughing and smiling and you'll realize what I mean. That alive energy creates our mind-body response: the feeling of love. The frequency is vibrating so high that you find yourself smiling or laughing and you may not even know why. In that state, you could easily picture every single cell in your body smiling. That's how powerful the energy of love is.
There are probably millions of ways to align with love. Some people already know how to get into this powerful state of being; some, like me, need constant reminders and visuals... I can imagine living as a Sim AND being the mastermind controlling the Sim at the same time. Can you imagine having all of that power and information behind every single choice you make? The ability to pull up a holographic display of all of your goals, needs, and possibilities as they arise - at any moment throughout the day - sounds like absolute heaven to me. It means much more ease in playing the game of life. And if the focus is on each goal as it arises, and not much else, then there would be less focus on negative mind-chatter (distracting from the inherent joy of life in the present moment). Well, we may not have the actual holograph come up in our vision or mind's eye, but we can learn to focus on one thing at a time (being truly in "the now"). And if we are free enough to take the next step, we can make the focus in every moment LOVE.
So no need for a romantic partner at all to experience love and no need for special VALENTINE's DAY store-bought things. If you can train yourself to become consciously aware of the formless energy that is LOVE, in the present moment, and the aliveness of alive forms all around you, a magic arises, which helps build connections to everything. I recommend simply going to sit in a state of "silent witnessing" at the beach to experience the awesome natural wonder of the ocean and earth. It's easier to sense the aliveness of the form if that form is nature-made, rather than man-made. By manipulating nature, to make our little heart-shaped candies, for example, we extract the divinity of love energy within the form. What's left is a slower energy vibration that is closer to fear and definitely less healthful. This explains why we get sick when we eat mostly processed-foods, rather than holistic food sources from nature.
Regardless, today especially, practice the art of self-love. Ignore the mind-chatter that says you aren't good enough because you're not in a romantic relationship. Find something alive/nature-made that you enjoy being close to, whether it's a person, place, plant, or animal. And just BE with that form. And if you aren't single, focus on the love energy exchange you can have with your partner in lieu of attending to the man-made items around you. Practice stillness everywhere you go, because that focused attention on what you love brings true joy.